“I was looking up at the sky one night when I was about 10 years old and

I felt like my life didn't matter

and I guess it was, it was converting large space to large time

one star after another star after another star, and wondering whether that would keep going forever.

Had the sense that the universe that existed a long time before I was born and it would exist a long time after I was dead

and I was just a speck that didn't matter.

I don't matter. My parents don't matter. Nothing matters.

We're all just specks. We're just living in this brief moment. None of us were here million years ago, none of us will be here a million years from now,

and the universe doesn't care. It just goes on and on and on.

So why are we wasting time, you know, going to school, having dentist appointments, all that. Why are we wasting our time because none of it matters.

And then

I fell in love

and that changed everything

that mattered. Even though we might both be specks in the cosmos.”